How Kind Are You, Really?

Why Should We Measure Kindness?

      The inception of “Live Kinder” was because I had to do something.  I realized many people thought they were kind but were really unkind to the people close to them, even people that loved them.  They were downright mean. They justified being unkind because of something they perceived, which many times, were incorrect perceptions of reality but because the lens of their glasses were set to complaining and seeing only the bad, they felt justified to be unkind.  They did not want to see the good in people, because they could not see the good in themselves, but I could see it.  It hurts when people are unkind to you. Unkindness is never justified.   

     Hence, the need for a kindness measurement that take into your unkind acts, as well as, your kindness. What I love about taking kindness measurements is the measurements provide a gauge for all of us to be kinder people.   It is not about where you start but where you end on the kindness distribution curve.

What is your kindness score?

How Do You Measure Kindness?

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The kindness score is the number of times you are authentically kind divided by the number of times you are unkind or you are artificially kind that day.

The “Number of Authentically Kind Acts” is the sum of all the authentically kind acts you perform in a day.

The (Number of Unkind Acts + Number of Artificially Kind Acts) is the sum of all the artificially kind acts and the unkind acts you perform in a day. An unkind act is a deed that appears unkind, even on the surface. You do it for your own benefit, and the act is rooted in an unkind motive, such as, disrespect. It is any time you show callousness of heartlessness. An artificially kind act is a deed that appears kind on the surface, and you do for your own benefit alone or because you were coerced to do it.

Count everything authentically kind, artificially kind, or unkind you do, say or think. Be honest with yourself. Keep a small notepad close by and use a simple stick counting method to determine the total number of kind acts, as well as, the number of artificially kind acts and unkind acts. After a few days you won’t need the notepad, you will know if your net actions were kinder or unkind at the end of the day.

Calculate your score at the end of each day by dividing the total number of kind acts by the total number of unkind acts. The result is your kindness score.

Kindness Score Examples

This is how you would analyze your score. If your scores is

  • Less than 1, you are doing more unkind acts than kind acts
  • Equal to 1, you are performing as many kind acts as unkind acts
  • More than 1, you are currently performing more kind acts than unkind acts.